I love it how speeding up any film makes it look funny, even if it wasn’t to begin with.
…wow, my blog posts are beginning to sound a bit like status updates. It seems I’ve been spending too much time on Facebook…
So yeah, my year in exodus has ended, and I picked up a fiance in the meantime (sweet).
Now I’m back at uni getting ready to do my creative thing again, and I’m both stolked yet terrified. Do you have any idea how being stuck in the wrong job for a year can damage your self esteem? What the hell was I thinking?? Let’s analyse this shall we…
–Disclaimer: Mad Ramblings Ahead!–
- Centrelink is one of the worst-managed government systems in the world. It’s not enough money to even try living on. Way to go Australia for starving our future leaders of tomorrow. That’s really great. Dumbasses! I love learning and bettering myself but I can’t take this anymore. I want OUT!
- I need money. After waitressing in a gentleman’s club I’ve concluded that I don’t want to be a stripper after all (too many drunken army boys trying to touch my arse- and I was fully clothed, just serving drinks. No thanks. There’s a reason why those naked girls get paid all that money).
- I have had it with being broke and dealing with centrelink’s screw-ups. I may actually crack and get a (*gasp*) J.O.B.
- Wow, all this stressing about not being able to afford to eat properly and having to live with psycho housemates to pay the rent has weakened my immune system. I don’t have the stamina to be a uni student and work full time too. Oh, how convenient.
- Once again, I turn to network marketing (I keep doing that) Wow, this can really give me the freedom I crave!
- Hmm… it takes cashflow to start a business, and network marketing only pays off after a year or so.
- Perfect- I’ll build the business for a year, while I work on the side. Then I’ll have the money to go back to uni and focus just on my education- not on starvation and fraked up psycho housemates.
- Oh, I don’t have the stamina to do both…
- I guess I’ll have to drop out of uni and get a fraking J-O-B, even though I still don’t have the qualifications, the contacts, or the confidence to make money at anything Im actually good at yet.
- I do what all scared, disillusioned creative types do when society has run them down and made them question their values. I shall get another retail job… and it shall only be temporary!
- (12 months later, after having been re-diagnosed with depression and put on anti-depressant medication just so I can force myself to continue to leave those house and get on that crowded bus to the city with the other corporate zombies…)
- Frak this life, I am going back to uni to finish my degree and get myself together enough to actually make a living doing something I love and that I’m good at!
- This whole experience has made me realise that despite what they tell you in school, having a job (“any job”) IS NOT the answer. While working, I was only in a minimum wage retail job, since I had no qualifications (the reason I wanted to go to uni in the first place!) and when you’re no longer studying, you don’t get the same concessions like cheap travel tickets or discounted medicines, so with my health issues, and on minimum wage, I was just as broke as when I was a uni student, but this time I had mental issues to deal with too, from staying so long in the wrong job.
So this is where I am currently…
- Living with my fiance who I’m madly in love with and who I want to marry and have a good life with…
- But that’s on hold for now, since the only reason we currently have a roof over our heads is because we are renting a house which my mum owns and she has been able to give us a break with the rent since Scott lost his job.
- So there you have it… a job is not the answer, and neither is not having one. Either way I seemed to find myself in a similar situation so FRAK THIS- I’m going to do what I should have had the courage to do over ten years ago…
- I’m going back to university, and I’m going to FINISH MY DEGREE!
