“with great space fairieness comes great responsibility”

I keep being drawn back to my path, like a moth to the flame. It intertwines my existence and I have ignored it for too long. It’s who I am, who I have to be. I once again accept this into my life with love and pure intent.

When you accept yourself for who you really are then you take back the power in your life. You are truly free to make changes. And are in a situation to become empowered. It’s hard to change your life and yourself for the better while you’re sticking your head in the sand. Hiding from the truth won’t save you and certainly won’t empower you. It just makes you look like a fool.

I’ve noticed that on this path I keep getting hung up about “basics” and doing the basics right. Makes sense, as it is important. In the past, I’ve had trouble maintaining discipline and focus on the basics, then have slipped by the wayside too many times because I got so caught up in doing it or not doing it perfectly, or frequently, or at all. Then I didn’t feel balanced, or grounded enough, or healthy enough, or in control of my life cirumstances and feelings enough…  basically feeling “not good enough” or “enough” in general, and before I knew it I’d be slipping off the path completely once again. Caught up/ embroiled in the suckiness of my own life experiences and feeling powerless, despite my knowing better.

My life has felt like a circle of despair at times. I’ve been faced with chronic health problems for as long as I can remember, and have faced many difficult situations throughout the times of my life. And yet through it all I have survived. I’m still here. I’m stronger than I give myself credit for. And through it all I have learned… I can do anything.

I’m different than most mundane people. I accept this now. Wholeheartedly. I may as well embrace it and love myself for who I really am.

In the past I’ve gotten depressed about not fitting in or being “weird” and not being able to fulfil the expectations of other people and society. It made me think that there was something “wrong” with me because I wouldn’t fit in and “play the game”. It has taken me many years to come to the conclusion that I am actually perfect right now. There’s nothing wrong with me at all. I was born to “not fit in”, and to be different, to exist slightly outside the boundaries of the mundane world, only so I could help to change it, and empower others to help make the world a better place.

From inside the rabble-world you can’t see the forest for the trees. It’s only by stepping outside it can you see things in a new light, and then help pave the way for others. To rescue them from their own prisons. To show the way out of the darkness and chaos of the world, to help shine a light on a new path. A higher one. It’s part of my sacred mission and journey through this life. So I was meant to not fit in. This is my blessing.  It’s not a curse, it’s part of my sacred divine light mission to help heal the earth and its inhabitants of the fear and darkness that consumes them. It’s good.

During dark times in my life I have almost let the fear overrun me on several occasions. But now I see the light. I see my true self, and I understand what I was meant to be.

To truly acknowledge this is frightening at times. It’s not “normal”. Many will say it’s not even “real”. I am still terrified to consciously find and use the word which best describes it. And what I am. The closest I can come to now is “Lightworker” or “Witch”…maybe even “faerie”. But at the moment even that makes me cringe slightly. But I know I am different. I see things in a different way to most people. And it is a blessing (not a curse). Let’s take this one step at a time…

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